In the frozen silence, Auntie was first to react, letting out a piercing shriek. "Xinnian!"
Husband and wife hauled their precious son — who had zero will to live — down from the noose. Auntie clutched him, weeping like rain on pear blossoms. Uncle stood to the side, sighing heavily.
Xu Qian understood perfectly. For a young man, the three most mortifying situations: being caught by parents during some private, rhythmic activity; being overheard commenting on a female teacher's figure; and having cringeworthy self-insert fiction exposed to the world. Physical death hadn't occurred, but social death was complete.
I'm a trained professional. I won't laugh no matter how funny it is. Xu Qian stood off to the side going 'heh heh heh.'
Xu Lingyue turned and shot her elder brother a reproachful glare, a silent accusation of his schadenfreude. Xu Lingyin had been about to ask for candy but, seeing this scene, thought better of it.
Xu Xinnian, scholar to the bone with a quick mind, swiftly devised a counter-strategy. He rolled his eyes back, kicked out his legs, and fainted.
In the small courtyard that belonged to Xu Qian, inside the side room, he stripped off his clothes and sank into the large wooden bathtub. Cool water seeped into his pores. Every muscle went slack with comfort. The physique of a peak Essence Refining martial cultivator had excellent cold resistance. The greatest advantage of the martial path: tough, durable, hard to break.
Having escaped the crisis of life and death, he could finally contemplate certain philosophical questions about life. "Why are there no memories of the original body's death or coma?"
Xu Qian clearly remembered how he'd died — most likely alcohol poisoning. The cause: a promotion and raise that had him drinking in celebration. After resigning from the police force, he'd tried entrepreneurship, and by the second year received a thorough beating from society's cruel hand. He'd learned his lesson, started from the bottom, become a diligent corporate drone. Relying on overtime-grinding talent, he'd finally won approval, secured middle-class status, and gone out drinking with friends to celebrate.
*Slap!* He smacked the water. "I'd finally gotten my middle-class entry ticket, and next thing I know, I've been dimensionally demoted to feudal society. This is absurdly unlucky."
"Sixty thousand yuan still sitting in the bank for a housing down payment. The most tragic thing isn't being alive while your money's gone — it's being dead while your money's still there. Consider it inheritance."
"Give me one more season and I'd definitely hit King rank. I still haven't watched Attack on Titan's final season. The national team never won the World Cup — can't die in peace... oh, that one I'll let go."
"Oh no, I didn't delete the 120 gigs of waifus off my hard drive..." If Mom and Dad found it, I'd suffer social death too.
He drifted to sleep without realizing. When he woke, the sky had darkened. His whole body was soaked pale and pruned. He changed into clean clothes and tied up his hair in front of the bronze mirror.
The mirror reflected a young man's face — thick dark brows, sharp eyes, and from years of training, a hard-cut jaw. "Nowhere near my previous life's looks — the kind that shamed Tony Leung and humbled Louis Koo, so handsome it alerted the Party — but it passes muster." And his body was countless times stronger.
"But maybe that's not a good thing. I'd rather have transmigrated into a normal ancient era where everyone's combat power is pathetic. Here, there are too many experts. You might lose your head before you even realize what's happening."
This world didn't just have demonkind; its cultivation systems were a fractured kaleidoscope. Beyond the martial path — notoriously the unluckiest system — there were Artificers, Confucians, Buddhists, Daoists, Shamans, and Gu Masters.
Six hundred years ago, when Great Feng was founded, the first Director of the Directorate of Celestials ranked each system by grade. Xu Qian belonged to the unlucky system at Rank Nine: Essence Refining. His uncle was at Rank Eight peak: Qi Refining. Rank Seven was Spirit Refining. Beyond that, Xu Qian had no knowledge.
The Directorate of Celestials' Artificer system, on the other hand, Xu Qian knew a fair bit about — because the Directorate was unique to Great Feng and exceptionally high-profile. Their Rank Six Alchemists had inventions woven into every household.
Artificer system: Rank Nine Physician, Rank Eight Qi Observer, Rank Seven Feng Shui Master, Rank Six Alchemist. Further ranks were also unknown. As for the other systems, living in the capital his whole life, he knew very little.
Just then, a young woman in a green dress entered the courtyard — his aunt's personal maid, called Lü E.
"Young Master, the master calls you over for dinner." Lü E's brows and eyes carried joy, but her gaze was weary and haggard. She'd been sold into the Xu household at ten. When disaster struck and the servants were dismissed, she'd been fretting over her livelihood. Then in just five days the family rebounded — all thanks to the Young Master, she'd heard. This eighteen-year-old dainty maid now seemed shy and flustered before him.
"Er, don't call me Young Master." Xu Qian felt deeply awkward.
"But Young Master is Young Master," Lü E said, puzzled.
...Forget it. At least my surname isn't Wu.
The two walked side by side out of the small courtyard and into the Xu residence proper. Lü E hesitated, then said, "Just now, the master and the mistress were arguing."
"What about?"
"The mistress absolutely insists on knowing how the tax silver was switched and who did it. The master couldn't answer, and somehow it turned into a quarrel." Lü E lowered her voice. "Young Master would know, wouldn't he?"
On the way back, Xu Qian had told his uncle that the tax silver hadn't been stolen by demons — it had been swapped. His aunt had said nothing at the time, but apparently stored it away in her heart.
The inner hall. The moment Xu Qian stepped through the threshold, he was greeted by a wailing cry. Tiny little Xu Lingyin, arms swept back behind her, body pitched forward, head raised, loosed a piercing sonic assault upon her mother.
Uncle sat calmly sipping his wine. Xu Lingyue ate with her head lowered. Xu Xinnian hadn't yet recovered from the collapse of his entire persona and ate in silence. Auntie propped her forehead on her hand, the picture of headache.
Seeing Lü E come in, she said at once, "Take her away, take her away!"
Xu Qian glanced at the howling little sister. "What's wrong?"
"Mama lied! Mama said if we could go home, she'd take us to Laurel Moon Pavilion!" The tiny bean wailed. "Papa just said Laurel Moon Pavilion!"
The capital's premier restaurant, frequented only by high officials and nobility. Commoners and wealthy merchants weren't even admitted. For a dim child who couldn't remember her own siblings' names, remembering Laurel Moon Pavilion meant she'd eaten there once. Which proved the child wasn't stupid — her talent was merely misapplied.
Old Xu, well played. Using even your daughter as a tool to deflect trouble. Xu Qian glanced at his uncle, serenely drinking away. This tiny bean was his aunt's Achilles' heel.
"It was just a joke at the time. Things were that desperate..." Auntie sighed.
"Cheating a child. Auntie breaks her word." Xu Qian reflexively jabbed at her, making the beautiful woman's chest heave with anger.
"Big Brother, Big Brother, take me!" Seeing Xu Qian looked kind and was even speaking up for her, the little bean joyfully scurried to his feet and grabbed his pants, trying to climb up.
Laurel Moon Pavilion, one tael per head... Xu Qian said grimly, "Lü E, take her away."
The little bean was carried off.
Auntie kicked her husband under the table and nudged her chin surreptitiously toward Xu Qian. Uncle Xu felt this was a loss of face. He glanced at his son, whose thirst for knowledge had always been keen. Unfortunately, Xu Xinnian had socially died, and the dead couldn't speak. He could only eat.
The food was mediocre, mainly lacking a good stock — after all, everyone had only just come home. Xu Qian chewed without tasting. Annoyed, he fixed his gaze on his fresh-faced sister. "Lingyue, why do you keep sneaking looks at your brother?"